Jan.07
2015
Maria Sharapova

Maria Sharapova was a slight favorite on Friday against Simona Halep according to Sportsbookreview.com, but according to me, she’s always the favorite, I mean besides Anna Kournikova, but I don’t think Anna Kournikova actually ever played tennis, she was more get in it to get out of Russia, find a pop singer to marry and live the good life hustle….

What it comes down to is that all female tennis players are my favorite, even the manly ones, because they wear shore skirts and scream in some of the most erotic ways…

Here’s a top 5 Sharapova from Friday.

1- Here she is scratching her back with her tennis racket, because she can’t be bothered actually playing the game, that gets in the way of her down time, in what I like to think is more of the opening scene of her sex tape…called “Rough Day on the Court”….

Maria Sharapova


2- Here she is hitting the ball, because I guess she’s paid for that, in what I like to think is less of her playing her sport, and more of her opening dance moves for her stripping routine….

Maria Sharapova

3- Sweaty Tits – are the new sweaty panty….and I’m just like, if clothes are wet for any reason, sign me up.

Maria Sharapova


4- That Intensity in her face…is one that I like to think is probably what her O-Face looks like and that is terrifying…

Maria Sharapova


5- I call this pose “Anal for the first time”…I am sure the tennis officials have a different name for it…

Maria Sharapova